Missouri Ends Drive on McGwire's Highway of Deception
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3/02/2010 11:50 PM ET By Greg Couch
It's a stretch along I-70 that welcomes people to downtown St. Louis, like a welcome mat, really. A first impression. And the Missouri Senate has voted unanimously to take down the signs showing its honorary name and change that stretch to Mark Twain Highway. It had been this:
Mark McGwire Highway.
So at least the government is hitting the right Mark now.
I'm sure there is some good lesson in this, but my first thought is this:
One of America's great literary figures is Plan B to a cheating baseball player. Somehow, this is a cross between an insult to Twain and straight comedy.
"When a person cannot deceive himself, the chances are against his being able to deceive other people,'' Twain once wrote.
You see how timeless he was? It's as if he said that right after McGwire's testimony in Washington at the steroid hearing.
The road had been named after Twain, and then was switched in 1999, the year after McGwire hit 70 home runs.
That's 70 more, after all, than Huck Finn ever hit.
Now that McGwire has finally fessed up about the obvious, that he used steroids, imagine how embarrassed the state government feels about drooling over an athlete.
Of course, they were surely embarrassed already. In the years that McGwire declined to admit anything, he wasn't deceiving himself. He wasn't deceiving other people.
State Sen. Ryan McKenna, who was in on changing the name from Twain to McGwire in the first place, proposed removing McGwire's name.
"Having been one of the people who carried that bill, I do have a sense of regret that I moved it forward,'' he told reporters. "We basically wrote the final chapter in a book that wasn't written yet.
"I think the legislature should take, and I personally should take, this as an example to not name roads after people while they're still alive.''
Yes, the dead have difficulty embarrassing themselves later.
But this isn't about naming roads. It's about a lesson over why we shouldn't turn athletes into heroes and gods. Tiger Woods has been giving us daily reminders about that, too.
And somehow, as part of a partnership among athletes' vanity, corporate interests, and media, with willing fans, these sports figures are put on a mountaintop without ever having to divulge who they really are.
Never again.
I think it is ... an embarrassment as you drive down the highway and you see that. It's clear what we thought we were celebrating when we named it after him is not actually what happened.
-- St. Louis Alderman Antonio French Ha! I was just kidding there. The message has come through so loud and clear for so long, but nothing changes.
It's nice at least, though, to see someone not accepting these fake apologies for a change, saying straight out that it's not OK to keep playing this game of accepting our love and money dishonestly, and then making a brief, phony apology and having everything immediately forgiven.
So now the Missouri Senate is suggesting that it not honor anyone again until the person is dead.
Not a bad idea. How many Final Four banners, bowl victories, Olympic medals and bicycle races have been returned anyway?
Might as well just wait until the statute of limitations has passed.
"Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it.''
Twain wrote that, too.
This is just so telling. I can just see the Senate 11 years ago thinking this through:
Seventy home runs. I-70. Our hero. Votes in the bank.
One of the greatest American writers? Yeah, whatever.
"I think it is kind of an embarrassment as you drive down the highway and you see that,'' St. Louis Alderman Antonio French told the local Fox News about the McGwire sign on I-70. "It's clear what we thought we were celebrating when we named it after him is not actually what happened. It is not the case.''
The Senate bill now goes to the State House for vote.
So McGwire is now the batting coach in St. Louis, and it's obvious that he only admitted to steroid use as a way of getting a pass back into baseball.
It was a terrible thing that McGwire did to you, did to all of us, by deception.
Reports from St. Louis now are how hard he's working. Good for him.
Maybe he can find peace with himself while writing the final half of his life's story. I hope he does, really, but it won't be easy if he drives to work every day on Mark Twain Highway, then puts on the uniform of his false glory.
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